Letters to My Teenage Sister – Does he EVER make you cry?

  • Posted January 21, 2014

Hey Sis,

I noticed the other day you appeared to be distraught after talking on the phone. In fact, I notice this to be a regular occurrence. What has been making you feel so bad? Have there been a lot of deaths recently? Are your friends having serious problems? Health issues? What could it be?

letters to my teenage sister | does he ever make you cryI trust that this is not the result of any one person. You would not put up with anyone being mean to you, right? You deserve much better than that. But then, you are doing a pretty bad job of hiding those tears. And I gotta think that if the reason for sadness was a death or illness, you would be open about it.

This leads me to think that there is a guy in your life causing these tears. This is unacceptable.

If he EVER makes you cry now, what makes you think he will ever stop later? There is no reason to be regularly mean enough to someone to drive them to tears. Especially you, my sister.

This is the time he is supposed to be courting and showing you the best he has to offer. If the best he has to offer is, to regularly make you feel like shit, then that is a huge problem. It’s a problem you can  and must fix.

If the man in your life ever makes you cry, Get rid of him immediately. If he belittles you, talks down to you, is mean, threatening, unappreciative, overly-argumentative, etc. You MUST move on. It will not get better. He won’t just change because you wish him to change. He is toxic.

I know you want to be married someday. So understand that any dating you do now is an investment of your time and energy towards marriage. He is giving you a preview of what your life will be like, if you so choose to spend it with him.

Follow me on this part, sis. We have seen society sneer at and undermine the nuclear family. But the nuclear family itself actually provides the foundation for a strong society and culture. A great marriage will feature the husband and wife working in unison to create a masterful symphony. The wife will need to be submissive and subordinate to her husband. And the husband will need to love his wife, treat her like his queen, and avoid ANY bitterness towards her. This only works if both parties fulfill their obligation to each other and to themselves.

I know you just want to be loved. But don’t accept mistreatment from a guy, just because you are in love with the IDEA of ‘having’ a guy. He is not holding up his end of the deal, so neither should you. You deserve better, so expect better, and don’t put up with anything less. Period.

If you don’t fix that last part now, you will find yourself unable to escape a marriage in which you are mistreated. You will be imprisoned by the fact that you are in love with the very idea of marriage, but not to your actual husband.

Sis, now and in the future, I hope that you remove any guy in your life that does not treat you with utmost respect. But also realize that it’s up to you to earn that respect. If you accept being a doormat, then a doormat is what you be regarded.

Instead, I pray that you become part of one of the greatest symphonies in our age.

Love,

Your brother Travis

 

Letters to My Teenage Sister

Letters to My Teenage Sister – 1 – Does He EVER Make You Cry?

Letters to My Teenage Sister – 2 – Leggings (and Yoga Pants)

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